So this week has probably been the hardest week
on my mission and maybe ever. On Saturday this week, things just really
got crazy and blew up. It all started as a beautiful day and I was
feeling great because I am finally on the tail end of my cold! I had
great studies and was excited for a fantastic day! About that time, we
got a text from Carla telling us that she didn't want to meet with us any more
and she'd let us know when she was ready again. After that, we went to go
get wifi and were syncing our iPads and trying to figure out what to do about
Carla when we got a call from the Elders. They said that Sister Watson
had called them trying to find out what was going on because Sarah had posted
on Facebook something that made it sound like Latoya was dead. It all
seemed like a big joke or something, like it couldn't be real. We got on
Facebook and started seeing that other people had posted things on Latoya's
page about how much they would miss her and how she had been on this earth for
too short of a time. We started crying and the elders told us to stay
where we were and they'd go over to Latoya's to see what is going on then come
tell us. Luckily we had tissues in the car from our colds because we were
both crying and trying to figure out what's going on. The elders
eventually got here and told us it was true. Latoya passed away Saturday
morning at 5:30. We honestly couldn't stop crying. Eventually the relief
society president called us to see how we were doing and said they would come
over to give us hugs. I think they were inspired because they stopped by
Sister Dickson's first and brought her along. She gives really good mom
hugs. We were eventually able to stop crying and get ready to go over to
Latoya's house. I put on waterproof mascara first though. When we
got there, everything was crazy, people everywhere, piles of stuff everywhere. Latoya
has always had big dreams and hopes for their little home and has been trying
to remodel forever. So Chris (that's her husband) has decided he is going
to finish all of her projects and was having everyone move everything out of
the house. He's really just in shock.
It was hard to see Sarah too because she was
trying so hard to hold it together. The other kids, Sam (11), Julian (7),
and Elizabeth (4) are over at their aunts house so we haven't gotten to see
them yet. And all of them have different issues like Sam has Aspergers
and Sarah takes medication for depression and Julian has depression issues as
well. And Sarah is only 16 but now she is going to have so many
responsibilities. Every time I think about Latoya and her family I just
start crying again. I remember my very first night here in Concord,
sister Nielsen told me we were going to be going on splits and I went with Latoya
and Sarah. And we got so lost! And in the sketchiest part of town
ever! Then we ended up getting to the right house and trying to teach
this lady who was totally drunk and racist against white people. Ha ha -Latoya loved recounting that story to anyone who would listen! Then I
remember we drove back to her house and while we were waiting, just talked and
got to know each other. Ever since that day in February I have visited
Latoya and her family at least once a week and usually more like three or four
times a week. I have always imagined staying in touch with Latoya after
my mission and coming back to visit them.
Sister Steimle and I really feel the weight of
helping this family and helping them apply the gospel in their lives.
Then, that same Saturday in the evening, we got transfer calls. And
Sister Steimle is being transferred. I honestly think we cried for three
or four hours strait. And apparently I am getting two new companions,
neither of which has been a Sister Training Leader before. It is so hard when
things change. Neither of us thought either of us would be transferred,
but I guess we were wrong. So anyways, pretty much the hardest day ever.
And both of us are bawling our eyes out as we write about Latoya.
Haha I am sure the office people think we are absolutely crazy!
Sunday wasn't much better because Sister
Steimle had to say goodbye to everyone. However, Amanda Johnson (recent
convert) was giving a talk and it was amazing! She talked about how much
she loved Latoya and how she knew Latoya would be proud of her for giving this
"speech". And she did such an amazing job! She talked about
tithing with so much passion and made eye contact the whole time! She had
just about everyone in tears by the end and the spirit was super strong.
I was also asked to lead the music that Sunday and when we sang the
closing song "a poor wayfaring man of grief" I just about lost it up
there. Oh and my arm almost fell off cause we did almost all the verses. I just
miss Latoya so much and it is hard to not figure she's just in another room
when we go over there. We visited them again after church. They are
trying so hard! Chris wants to keep the family together no matter what
and is trying to step up. Latoya was always the strong one in the family,
the person that holds them all together. I always knew if I turned around and
saw Latoya there at church, all of them were there. We last saw Latoya on
Thursday when we went over for a lesson and I just remember hugging her a
couple times and telling her how amazing she is and how much I love her.
We were totally there for longer than we were supposed to be but I
honestly didn't even feel guilty about it at the time. Now we know why.
I know Latoya is in a better place and finally not in pain anymore.
She really was in pain all the time and I think she just didn't tell
anyone just how bad it was. The doctors couldn't figure out what was
wrong with her either and I remember her once telling us that her organs were
shutting down for no reason. She was only 35. I am sure she would
smack me if she were here for crying so much. We also found some pictures
we had taken with her in them and it is crazy how much they mean to me now.
I just wish I'd taken more pictures! Things can change so quickly
and then it is too late. So we have also been taking tons of pictures and
videos of just about everything. Like we went over to our ward mission
leaders home and the elders ended up showing up as well since Elder Prestwich
is getting transferred. We were just laughing and talking and
taking a ton of pictures. It has been so fun to all be together for three
transfers! Watching Sister Steimle saying goodbye to everyone and
everything hurts. I feel like I am saying goodbye to my best friends,
Sister Steimle and Latoya.
Anyway, this is getting really long and is
probably fairly depressing. Sorry about that! I really do love being on a
mission and I love my Concord family. I know God lives and He is truly
looking out for us. I have seen so many of His tender mercies in the last
couple of days! He loves Latoya's family and He loves me and He loves you!
His hand is in everything and even though trusting can sometimes be hard,
He sees the bigger picture!
I sure love y'all!
Sister Morris
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